


Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Slashed

by curtangel



Category: Hamlet - Shakespeare, Rosencrantz & Guildenstern are Dead - Stoppard
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-07-01
Updated: 2005-07-18
Packaged: 2018-07-14 20:39:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,764
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7189358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/curtangel/pseuds/curtangel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Takes place in Wittenburg when Rosencrantz and Guildenstern were schoolmates with Hamlet.<br/>Kind of meta (first part takes place in a non-existent Hamlet/Horatio story).  Italics indicate the text takes place in the fake Hamlet/Horatio fic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally written in July of 2005 and has been sitting on my Livejournal under private for at least a couple of years.  
> This is the only work I've completed to my own satisfaction. I've done some light editing to fix some issues that came to my attention in re-reading.  
> Archived 6/13/2016

_ Rosencrantz had had quite a day. It was, however, not the thing on his mind when he entered the room he and Guildenstern shared at Wittenberg.  _

_ Guildenstern was already home, still fully dressed from the day. He was wandering about their room flipping a coin, somehow managing to convey both indifference and intense interest in its results in a way only he could. _

_ “Did I interrupt any deep thoughts about the nature of humanity?” Rosencrantz asked genially. _

“I think,” Guildenstern considered the coin, examining the front and back. “I figured out why I waste my money in this manner…”

“Oh?” Rosencrantz removed some of his outer clothing and prepared to remove his boots, looking with interest in Guildenstern’s direction.

“I am trying to recompense for the guilt I feel about my wealth versus my republican sympathies.” He flipped again, mentally adding it to the total. “I lose it and spend it uselessly on odd items in the hope that some of it will trickle back to the original owners.”

“Why not just give it back directly?”

“I haven’t gotten that far yet.” Guildenstern spun the coin, and looked disappointed at the results. “When I have an answer, I‘ll tell you. Know thyself…”

He spun again. 

“Nine.” 

“Plus or minus?” Rosencrantz meandered over to look.

“Minus.”

“Already? How many has it been?” 

“23 to…” he spun again looked, and corrected himself “24 to 14.” 

“That’s unusual.”

“It will even out. In the end.”

Rosencrantz gamely reached into his moneybag to pay up.

“Wait.” He waited. Guildenstern held up a coin determinedly. “Double or nothing.” He moved to flip it, and stopped. “Why do you trust me?” He did his best to look mock-sinister, but succeeded mainly in looking mildly ill.

“What?”

“How do you know that I got the results I said?”

“It‘s a matter of honor, isn't it? We have no need to steal from each other. And I win about as often as I lose.” Rosencrantz returned to his “getting home” rituals, putting away his boots, hanging up his jacket and hat…

“So, you are operating on the assumption that my honor means more to me than any money I would win, or any amusement I would get from cheating you.” Guildenstern flipped the coin and held his hand over it suspensefully, dragging it out in the manner of an amateur magician, about to attempt a trick in front of an audience for the first time.

“If I found out you were cheating, I wouldn’t play anymore.” Rosencrantz shook his jacket, hopeful that something would come out. What, he wasn’t sure. Occasionally, some odd trinket, or coin seemed to find its way into his clothing. 

“That’s true.” Guildenstern deflated slightly. He lifted his hand. “You win.” He tossed Rosencrantz the coin. Rosencrantz wasn’t expecting it and dropped his jacket and the coin onto the ground. The coin spun before landing on heads.

“I win again!” He hung up his jacket and started to pocket the coin… and stopped. “Unless you’d like to…”

“No, no… I believe you. And even if you were… it’s only a coin.” Guildenstern sat and seemed to settle into his own thoughts. Rosencrantz sat next to him, placing his head in his hands for a moment, before standing again. Standing did not help.

“I had an interesting day. I saw Him today.” Rosencrantz did his best to keep his tone light.

Guildenstern looked up, not particularly interested in the subject so much as conversation. “Him? Really? I thought He was avoiding us.” 

“I thought **we** were avoiding **Him**.” 

“He’s avoiding us even if we’re avoiding Him, because if we don’t see Him when we’re avoiding Him then He‘s avoiding us.” Rosencrantz stood still, attempting to reconstruct what Guildenstern was saying. “Why did you see him? Where?”

Rosencrantz sat next to him, eager to talk about his day. “The Louse… though he’s not really a louse, he’s just a bit irritable at times and who isn’t…” Guildenstern raised his eyebrows impatiently. “Right… he dropped a folio he was carrying… the papers went everywhere and he started to yell at me to pick them up...”

“When it wasn’t your fault? That louse…” Guildenstern stood in indignation momentarily before realizing that there was no action to be taken. He sat quickly.

“It… might have been my fault. I tripped while I was walking and he tripped over me…” Rosencrantz shook his head and shook his hands helplessly. “it was a big mess. He... saw me and acted as if we were long time friends. Even helped me get some papers that I couldn’t get myself. Very nice of Him.” He grinned with triumph... 

“I’ve never known him to be so generous.” Guildenstern said dryly.

“It shut up the Louse, that’s for sure. He even gave the Louse a long lecture on the importance of diplomacy towards students from other countries ‘All visitors are ambassadors’ and that rubbish.”

“He said that?”

“He seemed to think it was funny. He laughed all the way back to his rooms.”

“You went to His rooms?”

“Well, he said that good ambassadorship was important, and then he told me that he had a fellow student he’d like to me to meet… I felt like I had to go.” Rosencrantz’s words trailed off, and he looked down.

Guildenstern was reminded of something… he stood dramatically “And then it was only a matter of time before he whisked you into his private rooms and took your virtue.” The sarcasm dripped from his words, puddling on the floor. 

Rosencrantz held up a finger, trying to prevent his sarcasm from messing up their floors further. “Well, I’m getting to that.” Guildenstern was too taken aback to respond. “You see, Horatio was there and we all had a very strange conversation… I’d almost think they were talking about something other than what I was talking about…”

“And that’s when you went back to his rooms and performed acts of sodomy?” Guildenstern asked, waving his hand trying to catch the last few drops of sarcasm.

Rosencrantz brightened. “Oh, good! I was worried that was unusual. So, if that’s the normal thing, then I don’t have to worry about it. I’m all for it.”

“It is unusual.” Guildenstern was all attention, looking very serious.

“Did I say all for it? I meant…ah…” He tapped his fingers nervously. “Do you think I’m scheming?” 

“Why would I think you’re scheming?” Guildenstern watched him intently

“Why wouldn’t you?” Rosencrantz demurred.

“Have you been scheming?” Guildenstern’s tone became more demanding, yet there was still enough play for them to pretend they were not really questioning each other.

“About what?”

“Or who?

“Who?” Rosencrantz was puzzled.

Guildenstern jumped at the chance. “Foul! No repetitions.”

“I was really asking.”

“So was I.” Guildenstern’s voice cracked slightly as he nervously looked around. “You realize, proper submission to authority doesn’t necessarily include that.”

“Oh… I know.”

“You didn’t have to…”

“Well, I didn’t want to insult him.”

“How would he have been insulted?” Guildenstern stood and paced nervously. 

“I don’t know… but he seemed to be under the impression that you and I were… together.”

“Oh….” Guildenstern rubbed his temples, not breaking his stride. “And that’s what led to full penetration?”

“Well, before that he was doing some things that were… quite nice… and I thought I’d just do what he said. He was very nice about it.” There was a very long moment. 

“It just seems that everything is nice. It happens all of the time.” Rosencrantz looked down, turning a bit red, Guildenstern continued, speaking in a strange mix of tightly controlled anger and gentle concern. “A person cannot be a part of court without being aware of these things. . . It is part of the distribution of power. Everyone has gotten an offer of that sort at least once. Hamlet is well loved. He is attractive. You could certainly have done worse.” He closed his eyes for a moment, squeezing them closed. “Do you realize the political situation you could have just stumbled into? It could be involving things we would never understand. “ He opened his eyes “Or He could have just been randy and rude. But we don’t know, do we?”

Rosencrantz looked at the floor determinedly fighting back something. Playing with his fingers. “I thought maybe… it was something some people already did. He acted as if things were normal. I thought, it might be interesting to try it, if it’s not that big of a deal.”

“He’s the future king of OUR COUNTRY, saying hello to him on the street is a big deal.”

“He’s not that Prince Hamlet…is he?” Rosencrantz screwed up his face slightly, as he peered at Guildenstern, who nodded. “He… I… really?” 

“What kind of prince did you think he was?”

“One of the minor ones…I don’t know…” Rosencrantz nervously started to tap out a non-existent tune on a nearby armrest.

“So, now you realize why you can’t tell anyone else?”

“I wouldn’t have told anyone else.”

“You wouldn’t?”

“No…” They looked at each other for a moment. That small piece of information, dropped so casually seemed to reaffirm a link between them.

The door creaked open. The interruption separated them and they both looked away nervously as if they had been caught.

“Boys, you got a message while you were gone.” The widow who leased them their room did not feel it necessary to knock. She also addressed them only in the plural, even when she spoke to them individually.

“Why didn’t you give it to me earlier?” Guildenstern demanded haughtily.

“Were you here? I didn’t notice.” She casually dropped the note on a nearby table. “Be dressed tomorrow morning, I’ll be by.”

The information did not seem to sink in as the both eyed the message nervously.

“It has your name on it.” Rosencrantz said helpfully.

“I see that.” Guildenstern picked up the note carefully, as if he were expecting it to explode. He quickly skimmed it contents, his expression not revealing any secrets. “The king is dead. He has been called home, immediately. We’re to stay here in case there’s trouble…” Guildenstern looked at the back of the letter as if to see more. “So… that’s that.”

“He was a fine man… a warrior… he lit the halls of Elsinore with his majestic presence.” Rosencrantz said lugubriously.

“You knew him?”

“No… I think once I saw him in a parade… But he’s dead so he’s a great man.”

“In death, there is only praise.” Guildenstern mused.

“Of course, that praise is done by the living, so living is a lot better.” Rosencrantz seemed quite pleased with himself.

“So we can exist to praise the dead?” 

“Something like that.” Rosencrantz’s enthusiasm dampened slightly.

“But this… this will take care of any problem.” Guildenstern could barely contain his joy. “Hamlet will be busy back home, and we’ll be here… and by the time we come back, He’ll have forgotten all about it.”

“About what?” Rosencrantz looked confused for a few moments as Guildenstern eyed him darkly. “OH… Yes. That sounds about right. He didn’t act as if it were a big deal. I’m sure you’re overreacting anyways.” 

_ There was a knock at the door. _

It wasn’t so much the knocking that caused them to start, so much as the sharp insistent nature of it. Some people manage to make knocking as much of a personal intrusion as if they had entered unannounced.

“Who do you think it is?” Guildenstern whispered. They had both instinctively dropped to the floor, in an attempt to circumvent any prying eyes that might peer through their shutters.

“I don’t know… but I hate it when people come to visit.” Rosencrantz whispered back “You can‘t hide. They always know you’re there, because you aren‘t expecting it and make a noise they hear. You can‘t leave because they are at the door. You‘re stuck to deal with this person whether you like it or not.”

“If you have good servants you don’t have to.” Guildenstern whispered back.

“Well, pretend to be the butler and shoo who-ever-it-is off.”

“Why do I have to be the servant? No one will believe I am your servant. Why can‘t you be my servant?”

_ “I know you’re there. The criminal always returns to the scene of the crime.” _

They looked at each other oddly, mouthing the name of the speaker, but not daring to speak aloud.

_ “You lot are just leeches sucking off of the royal body. Living your decadent lawless lives… You make me sick, flouting the nature of authority that God set down.” _

“We can’t let him stand out there shouting…“ Guildenstern ran towards the door and  _ opened it. _

_ “Just what are you saying?” he shouted into the humid air, the wind ruffling his hair. _

_ “I don’t think there are many interpretations of what I’m saying, in particular for you since you know exactly what I mean, because you did what I‘m accusing you of.” Even in the street clothes he was wearing, Hamlet glowed with a regal light of his own. _

Guildenstern blinked a few times and shook his head a bit.

_ “If you were a lesser man those would be fighting words. Nevertheless, we are ambassadors to this country, and it is unwise for us to air our petty grievances in this manner. “Guildenstern stretched out the word ambassadors making his point loud and clear. _

_ “We are equals here. Name a date and a time.” Hamlet lost his temper at the reminder of his indiscretion earlier that day, Horatio’s cold words still lingering in his mind… he had to take it out on somebody and the most convenient somebody was right there. _

_ “How about right now? I’m ready when you are.” Guildenstern moved his hand, keeping it wavering slightly above the hilt. He was bluffing. _

_ Hamlet made a move towards his sword hilt when a hand stopped him. Horatio’s familiar hand caressed his. _

_ “He’s not worth it.” Horatio said quietly. His voice soothed him in a way only his could. Hamlet closed his grey eyes and relaxed his hand… It brushed against Horatio shortly before… _

Rosencrantz had cracked the door, and heard everything. He opened the door and tried to get Guildenstern’s attention by throwing a pebble at him. When he reluctantly turned, Rosencrantz waved his hand asking silently “What was that?”

“I don’t know” Guildenstern’s shrug responded. He then patted his sword hilt pointed at Hamlet and shook his head. It made sense as he did it, but later he couldn’t remember what he was trying to convey with that particular set of motions.

They could feel Hamlet’s attention returning to them like the heat of a spotlight. Rosencrantz quickly re-closed the door, and Guildenstern expertly re-took his pose.

_ The Prince opened his eyes again. The orbs took on a new purpose, a new light. He was king. He was above this. He moved his hands palms up as a sign of peace. _

_ Guildenstern relaxed, and laughed nervously as if it were all good fun between friends. They approached each other, and shook hands in a motion that was almost violent., yet to onlookers would only convey the main: two friends who had had a bit of a fight and were now trying to save face while making up.  _

_ Smiling wildly, Guildenstern said between clenched teeth, “If I find out you’ve touched him again…”  _

_ “Don’t worry; you’ll have your scheming Ganymede all to yourself.” They patted each other on the back and separated. _

_ Horatio put his arms around Hamlet’s shoulders “I think we need to have a talk…” _

_ Guildenstern returned to the room Rosencrantz and he shared, looking behind him curiously for a moment. _

 

“Well, that was lucky. He would have had you beat in a moment.” Rosencrantz laughed nervously. 

Guildenstern started to argue, but thought better of it. “I guess we’ll have to watch our backs…steps…not step backwards or… badly…” he tapered off. 

“I’m sure he’ll have bigger things to worry about than us. He would never… we were friends. Good friends. Weren’t we?”

“In the end, he is King more than he was our friends. “ Guildenstern looked away. They both tried to ignore the fact that they were already using the past tense.

“Do you know why he…” Rosencrantz tapered off.

“I was hoping you did.”

“Ah… We are talking about him calling me scheming, right?”

“Yes.” Guildenstern considered it “Our people are notoriously…” He searched for the word. “Patriotic? No…it is like that, but with more ‘doesn’t want to know about other countries‘… gynophobic? Is that even a word?” Rosencrantz started to interrupt, but Guildenstern raised a hand to stop him “Xenophobic. Our people are notoriously xenophobic, and for you to school here with no relatives nearby or any apparent social or political reason…. It looks odd. ” 

“So, he doesn’t trust me because he’s xenophobic?”

“Exact… no. You see, we all have a reason to be here. Hamlet is here for reasons of ambassadorship and learning, I’m here because this is the hotbed of philosophical and scientific thought and you’re here because….”

“My family sent me here?”

“And presumably your family sent you here in the hopes of you achieving some sort of social or political alliance to their advantage. At the very least, befriending the crowned prince…”

“Oh… I thought they sent me here because I asked to come here.” 

“Why did you do that?” Guildenstern examined him closely. 

“I don’t remember. I must have had a reason. It seemed like I did, at the time.” Rosencrantz was trying to evade the question almost physically, shifting back and forth uncomfortably. 

Guildenstern stepped closer, “Sometimes I wonder…” he put his hand on the side of Rosencrantz’s face. They looked into each other’s eyes, looking for an answer, and only seeing a question reflected in turn.

“I think maybe there’s something going on between him and that student…” Rosencrantz sputtered.

“You think so?” Guildenstern asked idly. There was a snap between them. An emotional pulling back, that was mutually almost painful. 

Guildenstern stood, and walked to his desk, lighting a candle. He put his hands down on the desk, spreading out his fingers, breathed. Then, he turned and smiled politely.

“I’m going to be staying up late. I still have work…schoolwork… to do. I am just glad that he is going. We won’t have to deal with this anymore.” There was something strangely final about the statement. 

Rosencrantz tried to pull him into conversation, but he wasn’t moved. After a while, Rosencrantz lay in bed, and at the very least imitated sleep. He woke in the middle of the night on the floor with his arms wrapped around his pillow. After a few moments of confusion, he realized what had happed. Guildenstern had separated their beds.

 

_ Back at his rooms, Hamlet donned his mourning clothes and prepared for his journey ahead. _

_ He searched for the words that would change everything between them, make things clear. But he had made so many mistakes that day, he was sure Horatio would be glad to have him out of his life. _

_ “You will always be welcome to Elsinore… Your friendship means more to me than I can ever say.” Hamlet shook his hand. _

_ Horatio smiled “I wish you would let me travel with you. It is a long and dangerous journey on your own.” _

_ “There are some things a man must do alone.” Unspoken was his worry that, fraught with mourning and fear of the responsibilities ahead, he might act with Horatio as he had with his countryman earlier. _

 

_ Hamlet set off on his path, a man alone. _


	2. Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Takes place in Wittenburg a reasonable length of time after the first part.  
> Kind of meta - takes place within a non-existent Horatio/Hamlet fic. This is where it gets a bit heated.

Guildenstern was quite sure he was dreaming. But the people he didn’t recognize around him were insistent that he was on a boat, its destination already set. He was surrounded by fog… he was alone… a pair of hands grabbed him pulling on his jacket, pulling him out of the fog to a familiar face.  
The words didn’t make sense.  
“He’s back. He’s here.”  
That couldn’t be right.  
“He’s with the pirates, love.” The words felt like he had to create them from scratch, each one dropping from his tongue with a clunk. “You’re dreaming… go back to sleep.”  
The fog surrounded him again. The hands returned again…  
“The pirates are back…my sweet.”  
Now he knew that couldn’t be right.  
He pulled himself out of the fog to find himself face to face with the speaker.  
“What are you babbling about?”  
Rosencrantz looked confused momentarily. His eyes drifted up slightly before returning down to him.  
“He’s here.” Rosencrantz whispered.  
“What?” Guildenstern was still speaking in the loud tones of a person rudely awakened and not fully aware. Rosencrantz took the opportunity to pick up the words Guildenstern dropped on the floor earlier.  
“You called me love…” his tone tightening with (presumably) amusement.  
Guildenstern took his words back, hiding them under the mattress.  
“Don’t play with my words.”  
He had finally woken up enough to perceive exactly how early he had been awakened. It was dark enough to squint. This means, earlier than he liked to get up.  
Rosencrantz pointed to the door, signaling for Guildenstern to open the door a bit and look.  
Guildenstern looked and quickly took a few steps away.  
“He’s here!” Guildenstern whispered hoarsely. Rosencrantz nodded. “Why is He here? He‘s supposed to be back home.”  
Rosencrantz motioned wildly with his hands before pressing them against his face.  
“He kissed me. I feel so used.”  
“You feel used because he kissed you?”  
“He’s obviously using me to get to you.”  
Guildenstern got a look of genuine pleasure on his face for a moment. “Really?” He was tactful enough to repress it. “I doubt he even knows whether you are you or me. If that makes sense.”  
Rosencrantz huffed up. “Well, I have every right to tell him to shove off.”  
Guildenstern languidly settled himself back on the bed. “Go ahead.”  
Rosencrantz faltered slightly. “Right… Going to tell the future King… the soon to be future King… to shove off.”  
Guildenstern pulled the blankets up and lay on the side with his eyes closed for only a moment before he felt someone sitting.  
“You aren’t going to, are you?” He asked without opening his eyes.  
“No.”  
“Fine, I’ll go.”  
Guildenstern got up resignedly. Well, he intended to get up. Rosencrantz pressed him back down again.  
“No… You shouldn’t go. Don’t you remember what happened last time?”  
Guildenstern tried to get a good look at Rosencrantz, straining his neck up a bit.  
“Let go…” Rosencrantz did. Guildenstern sat up. “I don’t like being… restrained.”  
Rosencrantz clapped his hands together. “He might have left on his own.”  
Rosencrantz walked to the door peeking through the boards… tentatively opening the door then swinging it open. And closed again.  
“Still out there?”  
“Yes… he had moved farther back… he was talking to someone. I don’t think he saw me…”  
Guildenstern figured out a timeline in his head. “He had to have gotten to court and turned around to come straight back. Moreover, that is making good time with no interruptions. Why would he do that?” Guildenstern looked at Rosencrantz for a long time. “I wonder… unless… but then there would be the complete irrationality in coming to see you…. I suppose making your beloved jealous to get them to realize their feelings for you is a classic plot…”  
“But in the end, it seems it would be more alienating than anything.”  
“Love is a salvation of its own.” Guildenstern reflected. “Even out of the graces of the world and… above, grace in your beloved’s eyes is the highest grace of all.”  
“Your beloved?”  
“Do you remember the orchard we used to walk through?” Guildenstern turned on him.  
“The one I stole apples from?”  
“Yes… Before…that… I used to walk through it alone. In the spring, the smell was so strong, I could taste them. I thought, no real apple could taste as good as this smells… Sometimes, if I close my eyes, I can still smell them… a physical presence felt but not seen… If you smelled the fruit from the Tree of Knowledge, would it give you the wisdom without the damnation? A little reward for resisting temptation. When I took you through, you just reached up and grabbed one… It never occurred to me that the apples were something I could just… take.”  
“They weren’t. That’s why we can’t go through the orchard anymore.”  
“I never even had one. Not a taste. Sometimes I pass by my old path and I think… just one bite… just one…” Guildenstern shook his head. “What would the world be like if Adam had refused the apple? Would it have been worth it? Loneliness in paradise is still loneliness.”  
“I could buy you some of those apples. They’re for sale in the marketplace. Still quite good, actually…. Not as good as during the spring... But good.”  
Guildenstern snapped his fingers and pointed at Rosencrantz excitedly. “Because I’d get credit for doing a charitable and good deed.”  
Rosencrantz was understandably confused, “What are you talking about?”  
“That’s why I don’t just give my money away. I’d get undeserved credit for a good deed and charity.”  
Guildenstern was satisfied. Rosencrantz sat forward, leaning on his elbows.  
“You could do it anonymously. People do it all of the time.”  
“Will you quit being so practical?” he snapped. “I’m trying to figure out something about myself and you keep throwing good sense at me. The human mind is no place for good sense.”  
Rosencrantz sat on the edge of the bed and looked down at his fingers, examining his nails. “I just don’t appreciate being used in this manner.”  
Guildenstern sat next to him and put his hand on his shoulder. “There, there…” he sighed. “Things will be all right. What’s the worst that could happen?” He thought of the answer to his own question, but kept it to himself.  
“Have you ever noticed,” Rosencrantz asked quietly, “that some days are bright and cold, unless the sun hits you a particular angle? Then it is unbearably hot on the top of your head. That seething heat that somehow finds its way through your hat to your scalp, that travels down your neck and back and dissipates somewhere around your spine. It is impossible to think right on those days. I don’t know about you, but I can’t think with a hot head.”  
“I’ve noticed…. We’re friends aren’t we?”  
“I should hope so.”  
“Would you consider yourself my equal?”  
“I… I’ve never really thought about it.”  
A sharp rapping sound filled the room. Strangely, it was less alarming than the knocking. Rosencrantz jumped at the sound anyway. The source was easily dealt with, a messenger.  
Guildenstern read the letter silently covering his mouth in shock. Rosencrantz grabbed it from him.  
The contents could be summarized as follows:  
The council elected the former King Hamlet’s brother to the crown. He was to marry the queen after a short mourning period. Hamlet has not arrived yet (at the time the letter was written) but his reaction and the possibility of civil war was a concern. Guildenstern was to stay at university for his own safety.  
“Well,” decided Rosencrantz. “That explains a lot. Though it seems odd that the message should have come after Him.” They looked at each other. “But why me?”  
“It’s a… dead issue. I hope. He will not be king and he will not be able to extract any kingly revenge. Maybe he‘ll be distracted by that one girl, or by political manipulation or something. As long as you keep your mouth shut, it will be like it never happened.”  
“Do you really believe that?”  
“No… But it makes things easier.”  
Rosencrantz put his head on Guildenstern’s shoulder and his arm around his waist. The intimacy of the gesture was somehow strengthened by the lack of hesitancy. Guildenstern moved to accommodate him.  
“Did you kiss him back?” Guildenstern sounded almost wistful.  
“Who?” Guildenstern gave him a funny look. “Oh… Him. I don‘t remember.”  
“What about before?”  
“It wasn’t an issue before.”  
Guildenstern stroked the side of Rosencrantz’s arm.  
“There’s no place to love an equal. Love has to be demeaning to someone. At least, in its physical expression.”  
“It doesn’t seem right.”  
“But without that we’d have chaos. Commoners… thinking they are as good as us.” he shuddered slightly.  
“I suppose you’re right.” Rosencrantz had a feeling there was something wrong with what Guildenstern was saying, but he couldn’t quite place it. It was better to agree. There would be time to think it over later. There was something special about now. Something more important than thinking.  
He lay back on the bed, moved onto his side and invited Guildenstern to lie down next to him. With some hesitation, he did. Rosencrantz moved in and, before he could react, gave him a swift kiss.  
Rosencrantz pulled back, and smiled.  
“I always wanted to know what it was like to steal a kiss.”  
Guildenstern looked at him, eyebrows raised.  
“Perhaps, I want my kiss back.”  
He leaned in, gently placing his lips against Rosencrantz’s, nudging his lips against his half still asking a question, but closer to making a statement. He pulled back, his eyes studying Rosencrantz’s face carefully.  
Rosencrantz licked his lips slightly.  
“I think you may have taken a little more than…” he didn’t finish his sentence before bringing his lips back to Guildenstern’s, all pretenses gone. He slid his hands under his shirt and felt a pair of hands snaking up his back in exchange. All there was in the world for a few moments were their mouths and hands, a tongue starting to tease, and another tongue responding… they wrestled slightly for position, before Rosencrantz gained the upper hand by moving his kisses to Guildenstern’s face, feeling the stubble under his lips, tasting his skin.  
“You see…” Guildenstern said between gasps, “absolute chaos…” He had hoped in some small part of his mind that wasn’t caught up in Rosencrantz's mouth that an attempt at humor would bring them out of it.  
Rosencrantz wasn’t fully capable of comprehending that statement, so instead he moved his kisses to a rather tasty part of Guildenstern’s neck. Scents engulfed his senses and someone was making whimpering noises of need. His mouth moved to the little knot in front, licking here, nibbling there, hands in his hair pushed him away yet pulled him closer as he carefully started in on a bit of exposed collarbone…  
When suddenly, Guildenstern pushed away completely.  
“No. Not now.” he hissed intensely. “We aren’t giving in now.” Rosencrantz was unsure of how to respond. Guildenstern often had odd ways of putting things. If a person heard what he said just right, it might seem that they had discussed this previously. Perhaps they had, and he just didn’t listen to what Guildenstern said. Sometimes he did tend to fade in and out…  
He said the only thing that seemed appropriate. “I’m sorry…”  
Guildenstern relaxed, and seemed to suddenly realize that he was lying on his back under someone else. He awkwardly pulled in his knees, and they did their best to rearrange themselves into a less compromising position. Neither of them wanted to get up.  
They looked at each other awkwardly.  
“Get up, and see if He’s still around.” It didn't matter which of them said it.  
“Why don’t you?”  
“Why don’t you?”  
“I’m a bit… put up at the moment.”  
It was Guildenstern who finally made the move to get up and move around a bit, his walking stiff and awkward.  
“You don’t need to be sorry.” He said, splashing water on his face as if to wash himself of their actions of a moment before.  
“Oh, sorry.”  
“You don’t have to be sorry for anything. Not even for…” Guildenstern motioned vaguely to the door. “You float around in a little world of your own.” He took a couple of deep breaths, “I doubt you even know what’s at stake… but I do.” He took a few more breaths. “And I’m going out there.” And he did.  
Rosencrantz didn’t move from the bed. He felt serious, but he couldn’t stop smiling. Even if nothing ever came of it, even if it never happened again, he had his answer. The unasked question had its unspoken answer, and things were back again.  
Guildenstern came in, closing the door quickly and sat down, picking up a book as if he had been sitting quietly reading all morning.  
Just in time, as the door came open with a “knock knock…” the widow who they rented from never knocked. This was bad.  
“Good Morning.” Guildenstern smiled a bit harder than necessary.  
“G’dmorning.” Rosencrantz murmured. He sat awkwardly on the edge of the bed, still smiling oddly to himself…  
“Good morning, boys.” she said sharply. “Perhaps I should remind you that this is my home, and I don‘t knock.” She picked up an apple from a bowl nearby. Polishing it on her dress for a moment before replacing it. “I may be an old woman not used to you young people’s ways, but in my day, there was a particular order to things.”  
“There still is, good woman.” Guildenstern swallowed hard.  
“Yes…” She looked at them suspiciously. “You should pick your friends more carefully. People might talk, and that kind of talk is the kind that would force me to ask you to leave.”  
“Oh… Those weren’t our friends. I was telling them to leave.”  
She looked at him with her odd cold eyes, and turned on her heels and left without responding.  
They looked at each other.  
“A love that is undiscovered flowers… and loves satisfaction can mean loves loss.” Guildenstern picked up an apple, considered it for a moment, and put it down. “Were these apples here before?”  
“I don’t remember,” Rosencrantz picked one up and polished it before taking a bite.  
“We are young… we have our whole lives to be… good friends.”  
Rosencrantz carefully swallowed his bite. “The best.”  
“Affectionate…” Rosencrantz opened his mouth to say something; Guildenstern stopped him with an upraised finger. “But not overly so…” Rosencrantz closed his mouth again. “Good friends.” Guildenstern put his palms down on either side of himself on the bed and breathed in deeply.  
“Do you think we gave Him any reason to think we were together?” Rosencrantz took another bite.  
“Maybe he saw something.”  
“Maybe he saw something we didn’t.”  
Guildenstern looked at him, not responding. It was still warm outside, but it was getting cooler. Fall would be coming soon.


End file.
